Monday, 31 May 2010


God reminded me yesterday, as I was shouting at Him, of a time a couple of weeks ago, when He found me on my knees, asking Him to break my heart. I was sick of apathy, sick of the lukewarm, sick of the monotony of half-prayers, sick of being drowsy and ephemeral.

My housemate has called me a 'little ball of righteous anger'. I'm not sure what I feel about this.

The past week, my soul's been torn up, twisted with such incomprehension in the face of rubbish stuff people are going through. In some ways, it's been horrible. But it's been real. I know that God will take us at our words. If we ask for more, He will give it. I want to ask for more, and the strength to bear it. Because I want to be that intercessor, I want to stand in the gap for these people, I want to be praying God's power into their lives, but I need Him to make me able. In a time when I need to be weak, I need Him to make that weakness His strength.

Let this be the start of a great work of God. Come on Jesus, bring life.

More of You. Less of me. I am not. You are.

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