"Don’t just pretend to love others. Really love them. Hate what is wrong. Hold tightly to what is good. Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other." -Romans 12:9-10.
People are all really different, and some personalities are just not going to tessellate closely. Relient K wrote a song which words this, "No I don't hate you, don't want to fight you...you know I'll always love you but right now I just don't like you". And I'm wondering if it's possible to really love people if we don't like them. Different kinds of love for sure. I guess then yes, it's possible. I don't think "but" should come after those three words though. What I'd like would be to have a different perspective when I'm looking at people. To be blind to the parts of them that clash with parts of me, and love them genuinely and unreservedly. After all, I'd like people to do the same for me. And most importantly, God sees none of my faults. He knows what I'm like but it doesn't change the way He feels. That's the perspective I want. Those eyes. That blindness and that sight. That love.
Text-a-toastie was pretty immense last night. A word that keeps coming up for God lately in my mind is "epic". He's just so great, grand, massive. 32 people turned up last night because He's so ravished their hearts that they're overflowing with the desire to share that relationship and love with students in Sheffield that don't know Him yet. Incredible! And little things throughout the night just screamed of His plan. As names were put to roles, some I knew before they were said, because God's spoke them so evidently. I can't describe it, I just love the heaviness of His spirit in that room and that group of people, different each week. It's tangible and it's exciting. Even when a fire-alarm forced us to evacuate out into the rain, I love how people grabbed flyers and spare toasties, seeing it as another opportunity to spread the love to those outside.
Afterwards, I wasn't feeling great, so I went for a little walk in the rain. I stood and watched the lake for a while, pondering. I settled on the fact that it had been an incredible night, following a few others, and I was really fortunate. If I consider how much things have changed since last term, it's quite amazing. Really amazing. I sighed and went home and wrote my portfolio, which I submitted at 3am, woke up at 11.30 and felt really gross for it. But still it's been a lovely day, and I'm looking forward to tonight. Hurrah. Hurrah.
I also love that I can hear "Happy Day" through the wall.